Friday, May 9, 2008

pretty good.

i am finally back in idaho! the plan was to come tuesday, and here is friday. i did have a great time partying by myself at liz and ryan's house, and that little gold car got me here ever-so-safely, despite a bit of hydroplaning. i usually enjoy solitary road trips, but this one was slightly... far too long. the verdict is: get new music. for the first time, though, i caught a glimpse of idaho and was in awe of how beautiful it is. looming rainclouds and a baby tornado did add quite a bit to the picture, but still--it was so green and rolling, even with the sagebrush.

the mishap of the day was when my hand was squeezed through the wood, diamond lattice of a fence to try to latch the gate from the outside. the dog spotted my hand and proceeded to jump all the way up to it. my reaction was to pull my hand away (sideways and back through the sliver-y diamond), which resulted in the loss of several layers of skin in select places, namely that part on the side. i'm not sure what that part of the hand is called, but i told elise that if i was making a baby-foot stamp with my hand, that's the part i would use. she understood immediately--either we're sisters or way too many people are stamping little feet with their hands. anyhow, it was a bloody mess.

oh dear, i digress. let's refer back to the title. i came to the harsh realization yesterday that, despite my sometimes valiant efforts, i am still just pretty good. well, i actually realized that my efforts aren't so valiant, which was mostly the harsh part. too many times i have made the mistake of thinking that i'm being or doing good enough, just because that's what the good people around me are doing. my obedience, goodness, and the expectations that are had of me have nothing to do with what other people are doing, or what they think of me. this quote is good for me:

"You cannot be too good. Patience is heavenly, obedience is noble, forgiveness is merciful, and exaltation is godly; and he that holds out faithful to the end shall in no wise lose his reward. A good man will endure all things to honor Christ, and even dispose of the whole world, and all in it, to save his soul."
Joseph Smith, Jr., Source: History of the Church, 6:427

i don't like to think of myself as a coaster (no, not the kind on the table), but i am sometimes. such an obvious thing, but it really hit me that i need to be progressing every single day. and how on earth do i do that? i have many ideas, but please shoot anything that helps you over my way. overall, the basic idea that comes to mind is to continue in faith--keep studying my scriptures daily, do not forget to pray, keep the commandments, keep doing good, and keep bad stuff out of my brain.

instead of watching another extravaganza of lame-ness on tv yesterday, i read about a million (15?) talks by prophets and apostles. (see? i'm trying. haha) another good-for-me quote is this:

"Rather than drifting into carelessness, may your life be one of increasing exactness in obedience."
D. Todd Christofferson

i think we could go so far as to say that this is my new motto. please don't be shy about holding me to it.

well, i guess i have just needed a reminder of what life is all about and what i'm living for. i always know what i'm supposed to do because that's what i know, but it's really nice to remember why i'm doing it, and to feel that serious motivation again. i would venture to encourage all of us to be just a little bit better tomorrow. well, today would be even better. :)

alright alright alright (me cheering-ish)

i am so very blessed to have friends and family who support me and love me and are such great people and good-doers. and, i know at least elise reads my blog. (thanks) i do love you all.

okay, time for me to sleep then go to taryn's baby shower. yay! goodnight.

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