1. his new favorite song
2. his bread knife
through a survey of 1001 people, a pair of russian artists discovered the most desirable and least desirable characteristics of a song, then created two songs using these characteristics.
"For example, people hate songs about holidays, choirs, and kids singing. So there was a passage where a children's chorus singing about Labor Day.
[Phil Ford] quotes an account of how the sonic parameters were selected:
The most unwanted music is over 25 minutes long, veers wildly between loud and quiet sections, between fast and slow tempos, and features timbres of extremely high and low pitch, with each dichotomy presented in abrupt transition. The most unwanted orchestra was determined to be large, and features the accordion and bagpipe (which tie at 13% as the most unwanted instrument), banjo, flute, tuba, harp, organ, synthesizer (the only instrument that appears in both the most wanted and most unwanted ensembles). An operatic soprano raps and sings atonal music, advertising jingles, political slogans, and "elevator" music, and a children's choir sings jingles and holiday songs. The most unwanted subjects for lyrics are cowboys and holidays, and the most unwanted listening circumstances are involuntary exposure to commercials and elevator music. Therefore, it can be shown that if there is no covariance--someone who dislikes bagpipes is as likely to hate elevator music as someone who despises the organ, for example--fewer than 200 individuals of the world's total population would enjoy this piece.
Hiphop tuba plus a soprano rapping about the Old West -- what's not to like? You can listen to it here. (boingboing.net)
we moved in with nothing but clothes and a few books, but were lucky to find nearly everything we needed in the kitchen. we inherited a pretty good knife, but it often squashed or crumbled ben's bread. when the knife wouldn't cut ben's new loaf at all, he searched frantically through the flatware drawer for something that would work, and found a nice-looking butter knife. or maybe it's not a butter knife, but its serrations worked like a dream, and now ben praises it day and night.
in my opinion, the french bakery down the street (where he buys bread) is a bit more exciting. the pastries look so delicious...